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My little house is finished for 95%. It’s not going to become more, I don’t like ‘finish’. I am able to enjoy it and there isn’t much more to take care of. I do get lost sometimes on my 65 sq. metres. It is a strange feeling, it isn’t that big and still I can roam around in wonder. I have been able to send some coherent and rather long emails this morning. Last month they were short and brief. Strange how your feeling of ‘place’ can influence your focus as well. As long as I have this feeling of overview and control, I can be part of the world around me. Today gives me the feeling of a day off. The weatherforecast indicated code orange; heavy thunderstorms and rain. That seems right, it has been rumbling over my head in the air. Still, I need to get out, to that forest at only 2 minutes from my appartment.

I don’t exactly know why that is, but thunderstorms are hugely attractive to me. I love lightning and thunder. Perhaps it is the realization of these enormous natural powers that make our attempts at controling everything seem rather poor. I read this week that if we were able to catch the suns’ energy for one hour we would be able to light the Netherlands for a whole year. There you are with your cole mines and gaspipes. It makes us into broddlers. Very inventive broddlers, I’ll give us that. Undergoing this thunderstorm gives me a feeling of surrender and challenge at the same time.

It’s muggy. The thunderstorm is on the horizon, rumbling constantly. It trails the Belgian border, just ahead. It’s raining heavily over there, I expect. Where I am walking it’s quiet. Cows are grazing lazily. Birds are busy keeping the night away for some time. At 6 the belltower of the church in the village of Ulvenhout calls the faithful to the service. It won’t be busy, I guess. Who needs a god when you have control over everything. We see events like thunderstorms and hurricanes as situations we can control and insure ourselves against. In the meantime dark clouds are gathering above my head. The Belgian border has proven to be no obstacle for this . The thunder is right above me and now and then the lightning flashes. I thoroughly enjoy this. I should be scared of course, you don’t go into the forest in a thunderstorm. Trees attract lightning. I love the challenge. Slowly it starts to rain but I am home safe before the real downpour.

I am not different from any of you. We admire thunderstorms and we challenge them. Yet it’s code orange, it has been for a while. For all of us.

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