The thunderstorm is coming closer, I can see the lightning from my little balcony in the small hostel in Virovitica from where I have created a base for my walks. Again a hot day comes to end, this time with a refreshing thunderstorm. I can’t get it on photo, film yes. Immensely beautiful. I would want a drink now but the shops are closed as it is independence day.
The owner here thinks I am pretty strange to go walking in this heat. So do quite obviously also all the people that are trying to find a cool spot under the trees.
I was moaning a bit about it last time wasn’t I? That didn’t sit well with me but I couldn’t exactly say why. You do have the right to moan in such circumstances, don’t you? The beauty of the walk through Austria followed by the ghastly circumstances here. It made me think back to the highpoint of some weeks ago and how my ego reacted. It reacted now as well. In my case it usually noticeable in ‘resistant’ behaviour. I realised I had walked into my own trap. Hadn’t I said so myself: this was going to be a nice walk!? And when it turns out not to be so nice, well then that’s not good, is it?! But it doesn’t work that way and certainly not with my somewhat impulsive planning skills.
You see, it is not so hard to sit atop of a gorgeous mountain and to come to beautiful thoughts and inspirations and to quote Antonio Machado. But the nasty, the difficult maybe points you to something even more essential. My essential question was: what are you doing here, what are you looking for? And I realise while walking through the heat that it is sustenance. Sustenance for the mind and the soul. Walking gets me that, much in the same way as others need yoga. I needed some beastly moments to become aware of that again.
Maybe the darkness is a better friend sometimes then the light. Maybe the beast is the hero and beauty, well just beauty.
The storm slowly fades in the distance, rain still dripping, a beastly beautiful sight and sound. Yet I am sure glad I am not in there.